The Hebrew-Greek Key Word Study Bible: NKJV Edition, Black Genuine Leather (Key Word Study Bibles)

This Bible is yuuuuuge! We’re talking at least an inch thicker than that last piece of cheesecake we all have to watch pastor eat at the potluck.

For my Pentecostal brothers and sisters: do not let your Evangelists swing this at anybody. You’ll have people speaking in tongues....from an altered mental status. Any ‘midnight cry’ you hear will be coming from the ER.

For my Baptist loved ones: you cannot simply load this into your military-grade backpacks and lug it down the pink and blue sidewalks at Bob Jones. If you do, you’ll be hunched over like Quasimodo on a forced march.

For my Methodist brethren: you’ll find the surface area large enough to sit your cassey-role dishes on but the references to ‘internet’ may confuse you since the word cannot be found in the 1986 Encyclopedia Brittanica you still use. The black leather will go well with the wood paneling in pastor’s office though.

For my Presbyterian folks: go with the version that has just the footnotes and the dictionaries since ya’ll already have the entire NKJV memorized.

For my sweet Lutherans: stop DMing me. This Bible does not, I repeat, does not come with a fifth of Jack Daniels.

For those non-denoms and otherwise unaffiliated: this version is sanctioned by Jack Hayford, John Hagee, Charles Spurgeon, A.W. Tozer, Tony Evans, Rod Parsley, Kenneth Copeland, Martin Luther, D.L. Moody, Josephus, Beth Moore, and/or Chuck Swindoll. Pick a lane😜

I absolutely love it.