The Gospel Comes with a House Key: Practicing Radically Ordinary Hospitality in Our Post-Christian World

*I received a free copy of this book from the publisher via #netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

I have been looking forward to reading this book; first, because the author is one I’ve admired from afar ever since I read her first book, Confessions of an Unlikely Convert; second, because hospitality is a ministry dear to my heart. I had high expectations for this book; and sadly, it slightly disappoints. Perhaps I’m being nit picky and I apologize if I sound harsh, but I need to give my honest review. It is perplexing because though I do not love the book, I do not have a problem recommending it to others.

I’m not sure if this is promoted as such, but it is part memoir, part theology lesson, part christian living kind of book. Interwoven are the theological basis, biblical illustrations and personal story about hospitality. Mrs. Butterfield is a good writer and could very well be the most qualified to talk about hospitality, but I still find issues in the book that I cannot give it a 5-Star rating.

These issues are not theological in nature, so I can still in good conscience recommend the book. For sure, it is highly engaging, saturated with Scripture, and convicting to the core. I’ve had to stop several times to repent for past sins in the area of hospitality and pray for God’s grace to help me a better hostess.

I cried reading about her tumultuous relationship with her mother. I especially love that she encourages us to not idolize safety and security, something American Christians are obsessed with. We need to live our ordinary lives radically and one way we do that is through hospitality. Here are some favorite quotes:

I know I can’t save anyone. Jesus alone saves, and all I do is show up. Show up we must.

Radically ordinary hospitality is this: using your Christian home in a daily way that seeks to make strangers neighbors, and neighbors family of God. It brings glory to God, serves others, and lives out the gospel in word and deed.

Christians must learn to practice radically ordinary hospitality not only as the hosts of this world but, perhaps more importantly, as its despised guests. Let’s face it: we have become unwelcome guests in this post-Christian world.

God calls us to make sacrifices that hurt so that others can be served and maybe even saved. We are called to die. Nothing less.

The job of an ally makes the cross lighter, not by erecting or supporting laws that oppose God’s law, but by being good company in the bearing of its weight.

Now for the disappointing parts...here are just a few:

Perhaps this is unavoidable when writing a memoir, and I have a sensitivity to humble-bragging because of my own pride problems, but I find her constant use of her own personal triumphs in hospitality as a little irksome. I don’t want to judge her motives, but it gets old when I read one hospitable act by the author after another. She did use other people’s examples, but it’s mostly about her and her family’s sacrifice and good works. This is especially interesting because she talks highly of her husband who would not “tarnish by bragging about it (one’s coming to faith through their hospitality) on a blog post or on Facebook. Kent is a Christian man. Christian men do not steal glory from God. This is the kind of news that moves mountains, something to be addressed in the sacred moment of table fellowship.”

Her schedule seems unmaintainable. Doing intentional ministry every day could exhaust even the most devoted Christian. As a minister’s wife, I understand that being in full-time ministry is a 24/7 kind of job, and opportunities to serve could come at any moment. But her way is to have something planned every day. Maybe these are assumed, but I ask her, When does she devote time alone with her husband? When does she foster one on one time with her kids? It is hard to imagine she has time for them just by reading about her schedule.

One of the characters she mentions in the book is Hank who starts as a grumpy neighbor and becomes a friend. Later on, it is found out he was leading a secret criminal life. I understand and admire the author’s compassion for her friend, but her intent focus on this made her question the fairness of his incarceration, made her forget his serious crimes that hurt a lot of people. His sins are somewhat downplayed. Yes, as a Christian, he has been forgiven, but he still has to face the consequences of his sins.

She quotes and uses as a good example a Catholic priest who “regarded hospitality as a spiritual movement, one that is possible only when loneliness finds its spiritual refreshment in solitude, when hostility resolves itself in hospitality, and when illusion is manifested in prayer.” This sounds mystical and, as an ex-Catholic, I seriously have an issue promoting any of them.

I found two typos: principal when she meant principle, tails instead of tales.

I appreciate:
1. When a book helps me interpret passages from Scripture that puzzle me. Rosaria did that in two instances in this book. (I won't give them away.)
2. When a book makes me want to read the Bible more. This one is one of those.
3. When a book so engages me that I can't put it down. Again, this was one of those.
4. When a book convicts as well as comforts me (i.e. it's full of the gospel). Ditto.

Bravo!

My husband read this and I'm half way through it and this book is worth more than it's weight in gold! I am going to need to read it twice but it's already changing our lives and our family. Rosaria says, "I know I can't save anyone. Jesus alone saves, and all I do is show up. Show up we must." We have a neighborhood dinner this weekend and we haven't made it to one before but we'll be there this weekend... here we go! Thank you to Rosaria and her family for sharing their lives, knowledge, and wisdom with us through this book!

This author is right there with Ann Lamott. I really tried to read it. My daughter gave it to me as a Christmas gift as it was recommended for me by her friend. I kept thinking, "What is she trying to tell me?" Nothing better than a "Christian" who toots her own horn. I can't even.

Well, I read her first book, and it was great. This one is not. She inserts her political views, which nobody cares about, and it irritated the heck out of me. Why do we need to bring politics into this? She also overdramatizes personal life experience that don't need to be dramatized. It makes the book ridiculous. And I think she does it because it would be boring otherwise. There's no organization to this- just rambling on about the series of events that occurred in her hospitality days. She is also way too liberal at times- shouldn't be giving out advice. This book is a crappy disappointment. She seems like a nice person though, just in need of spiritual guidance.

There are aspects to this book that are wonderful! Her writing is captivating and informed. Ive read her work in the past and was really looking forward to her expanding on this subject. However, I could not get past the self-righteous undertones. Every opportunity was taken to subtly imply her preference for activities and it felt as though she deemed those superior. Example; kids playing with frogs vs. kids who play comp. soccer or how she couldn’t just say she didn’t trust herself with her husbands heirloom ring but had to reiterate her communion bread making and gardening skills just wouldn’t permit it. I just couldn’t bring myself to finish the book. Hospitality is certainly a strong suit of hers and I’m thankful for her commitment to it and to her faith.

This is a book by a Christian for Christians. If you are not of the Christian faith, nor interested in becoming Christian, then you’re not likely to have a positive view of this book.

The book tackles a current set of social issues head on. Ostensibly, the book is about Christian charity and welcoming others into your home. Actually, the book is about something far more controversial. It is the story of an LBGT lesbian organizer that comes to know Christ.

I highly recommend that you start with chapter 3 because this describes her conversion process, and the chapter gives context for the rest of the book. Then, I would read chapter 5; it is the meat of the book.

The rest of the book can be read in any order. It is chock-full of anecdotes and useful information. Overall, it is a very uplifting story.

The book has several premises. First, as Christians we are called to be charitable to our neighbors. Second, it is through acts of charity and kindness that nonbelievers come to know Christ through the work of the Holy Spirit. Third, as Christians, you’re not asked to play it safe, but rather we are asked to go to the dangerous places where the need for Christ’s redemption is greatest.

I liked the book a lot. It very clearly drew the line between acceptance and advocation.

The book should appeal to a wide audience. Whether you are just curious about the social issue, or whether you are struggling in your own life or family, this book can provide some hope and solace for you.

I thought the introduction of druggies and others who were dangerous into her family household was wrong, especially since she has children at home.

I did not like her style of writing. Very hard to read. Stories jumped around a lot.

I'm super sensitive to people bragging on themselves. It's one of my many character flaws, but I don't connect very well to those that do it a great deal. It's why I sometimes have to unfollow people I know online. They're perfectly sweet and lovely people, but their bragging causes my mind to attach a bit of negativity to them. This book comes off like a constant bragging session, and while I'm sure that's not how it's meant to come off, it caused a huge disconnect from the book for me.

When I was able to look past that, it was interesting to see this particular family in action when it comes to hospitality. Hospitality will look different for each and every personality, but this book is full of great ideas on helping more.

If you're like me and are sensitive to bragging, I'd say pass this book up. If you're not like me in that area, it is full of ideas and the reminder to focus on others, and not self.