52 Things Kids Need from a Dad: What Fathers Can Do to Make a Lifelong Difference
52 Things Kids Need from a Dad: What Fathers Can Do to Make a Lifelong Difference book cover

52 Things Kids Need from a Dad: What Fathers Can Do to Make a Lifelong Difference

Paperback – March 1, 2010

by
Price
$12.99
Format
Paperback
Pages
192
Publisher
Harvest House Publishers
Publication Date
ISBN-13
978-0736927239
Dimensions
5.5 x 0.42 x 8.5 inches
Weight
7.4 ounces

Description

“I’m delighted to see so many inspiring, practical, unexpected ideas for dads in one place.” ―from the foreword by Josh McDowell “This is great stuff, worth any dad’s time. If you can’t benefit from this, you’re not listening. Ignore it only if you don’t want to be a better dad. The first three copies are going to my grown sons.” ―Jerry B. Jenkins, coauthor of the megaselling Left Behind series and author of over 150 other published works “Jay Payleitner has given fathers a gift…a wise, delightful, practical, and profound book. If you’re a father, you will thank him, and if you’re not, you’ll read this book with joy and give it to a father who will ‘rise up and call you blessed.’” ―Steve Brown, seminary professor, author of Welcome to the Family and other books, and the “voice” of Key Life Network “Moms of all ages, grab this book for your husbands! It’s inspiring, encouraging, and easy to read.” ―Ellen Banks Elwell, author of The Christian Mom’s Idea Book and When There’s Not Enough of Me to Go Around “This book is a must for dads who want to take their fathering to the next level. It's full of real-world advice anyone can take to heart and act upon. It's also fun to read with lots of stories. Formatted in short, easy-to-read chapters, you can pick it up at any time, learn something really useful, and set it down until you have a few more free minutes. I recommend this book.” ―James Read, Creative Director, Grizzard Communications Group “ 52 Things Kids Need from a Dad reminds all of us of the humbling privilege and exhilarating joy of fatherhood. You won’t find any lectures or guilt trips here. Instead, it’s more like 52 inspiring halftime talks. As your personal fathering coach, Jay will provoke you to think deep, laugh hard, and love more, leaving you with 52 unexpected fathering insights.” ―Carey Casey, CEO of The National Center for Fathering, speaker, radio host, and author of Championship Fathering “The stories will inspire you. The lessons will change you. Jay Payleitner shows twenty-first-century fatherhood for what it is and for what it needs to be.” ―Dr. Dennis E. Hensley, professor and author of more than 50 books, including Man to Man and The Power of Positive Productivity . “I have been a wife for 37 years, a mom for 31, and a daughter for...well, let’s just say even longer. With those credentials, I highly recommend this book to all dads. It is a good read and, more importantly, a great guide for any man desiring to meet the needs of the children God has entrusted to his care.” ―Kendra Smiley, radio host, conference speaker, and author of Be the Parent and High-Wire Mom “I’m delighted to see so many inspiring, practical, unexpected ideas for dads in one place.” ―from the foreword by Josh McDowell “This is great stuff, worth any dad’s time. If you can’t benefit from this, you’re not listening. Ignore it only if you don’t want to be a better dad. The first three copies are going to my grown sons.” ―Jerry B. Jenkins, coauthor of the megaselling Left Behind series and author of over 150 other published works “Jay Payleitner has given fathers a gift…a wise, delightful, practical, and profound book. If you’re a father, you will thank him, and if you’re not, you’ll read this book with joy and give it to a father who will ‘rise up and call you blessed.’” ―Steve Brown, seminary professor, author of Welcome to the Family and other books, and the “voice” of Key Life Network “The stories will inspire you. The lessons will change you. Jay Payleitner shows twenty-first-century fatherhood for what it is and for what it needs to be.” ―Dr. Dennis E. Hensley, professor and author of more than 50 books, including Man to Man and The Power of Positive Productivity . “I have been a wife for 37 years, a mom for 31, and a daughter for...well, let’s just say even longer. With those credentials, I highly recommend this book to all dads. It is a good read and, more importantly, a great guide for any man desiring to meet the needs of the children God has entrusted to his care.” ―Kendra Smiley, radio host, conference speaker, and author of Be the Parent and High-Wire Mom “Moms of all ages, grab this book for your husbands! It’s inspiring, encouraging, and easy to read.” ―Ellen Banks Elwell, author of The Christian Mom’s Idea Book and When There’s Not Enough of Me to Go Around “ 52 Things Kids Need from a Dad reminds all of us of the humbling privilege and exhilarating joy of fatherhood. You won’t find any lectures or guilt trips here. Instead, it’s more like 52 inspiring halftime talks. As your personal fathering coach, Jay will provoke you to think deep, laugh hard, and love more, leaving you with 52 unexpected fathering insights.” ―Carey Casey, CEO of The National Center for Fathering, speaker, radio host, and author of Championship Fathering “This book is a must for dads who want to take their fathering to the next level. It's full of real-world advice anyone can take to heart and act upon. It's also fun to read with lots of stories. Formatted in short, easy-to-read chapters, you can pick it up at any time, learn something really useful, and set it down until you have a few more free minutes. I recommend this book.” ―James Read, Creative Director, Grizzard Communications Group Jay Payleitner is one of the top freelance Christian radio producers in the United States. He has worked on Josh McDowell Radio, Today's Father , Jesus Freaks Radio for the Voice of the Martyrs, Project Angel Tree with Chuck Colson, and many others. He’s also a popular speaker on parenting and marriage and the author of dozen-plus books, including the bestselling 52 Things Kids Need from a Dad, 52 Things Wives Need from a Husband, and 52 Things Sons Need from Their Dad ; he also created “The Dad Manifesto.” Jay has also served as an AWANA director, a wrestling coach, and the executive director of the Illinois Fatherhood Initiative; he now partners with the National Center for Fathering, whose efforts he fosters and promotes. He and his wife, Rita, live near Chicago, where they’ve raised five great kids and loved on ten foster babies. Josh McDowell has been reaching the spiritually skeptical for more than five decades. Since beginning ministry in 1961, Josh has spoken to more than 25 million people in 128 countries. He is the author or coauthor of 148 books, with over 51 million copies distributed worldwide, including Straight Talk with Your Kids About Sex, Experience Your Bible, Evidence for the Historical Jesus, More Than a Carpenter (over 15 million copies printed in 85 languages), and The New Evidence That Demands a Verdict, recognized by World magazine as one of the twentieth century's top 40 books. Josh continues to travel throughout the United States and countries around the world, helping young people and adults strengthen their faith and understanding of Scripture. Josh will tell you that his family is his ministry. He and his wife, Dottie, have been married for over 40 years and have four children and numerous grandchildren. Read more

Features & Highlights

  • “
  • God, please help me
  • …another game of
  • Candy Land
  • …”
  • Quite a few dads spend time with their kids. However, many have no clue what their kids really
  • need
  • .
  • Enter author Jay Payleitner, veteran dad of five, who’s also struggled with how to build up his children’s lives. His
  • 52 Things Kids Need from a Dad
  • combines straightforward features with step-up-to-the-mark challenges men will appreciate:
  • a full year’s worth of focused, doable ideas―one per week, if desired
  • a full year’s worth of focused, doable ideas―one per week, if desired
  • uncomplicated ways to be an example, like “kiss your wife in the kitchen”
  • uncomplicated ways to be an example, like “kiss your wife in the kitchen”
  • tough, frank advice, like “throw away your porn”
  • tough, frank advice, like “throw away your porn”
  • And, refreshingly…
  • NO exhaustive (and exhausting) lists of “things you should do”
  • NO exhaustive (and exhausting) lists of “things you should do”
  • NO criticism of dads for being men and acting like men
  • NO criticism of dads for being men and acting like men
  • Dads will feel respected and empowered, and gain confidence to initiate activities that build lifelong positives into their kids. Great gift or men’s group resource!

Customer Reviews

Rating Breakdown

★★★★★
60%
(184)
★★★★
25%
(77)
★★★
15%
(46)
★★
7%
(21)
★
-7%
(-22)

Most Helpful Reviews

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52 Things I Wish I Knew When I Was Raising My Three Sons!

In his book 52 Things Kids Need From A Dad, writer, speaker, radio producer and a dad of five offers good, sound and practical advice concerning 52 things that kids need and want from their fathers. There are things that dads can do in the lives of their children that can make all the difference as to how they turn out as adults. This is a handy "how to" do it right guide for fathers so that we can learn how to be more effective and successful in our roles as dads.

Beginning the book with `A Lesson From Hollywood," (you would think a most unlikely place to get much good advice about fathering from), author Payleitner shares something that 3 movies, Top Gun, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, and Forrest Gump all have in common. I am not going to tell you what that one thing is...you'll need to buy the book and read it to learn what it is that Hollywood taught us from those three movies about the relationship between fathers and their children.

After giving us a lesson from Hollywood author Payleitner then shares with us 52 things kids need their dad to do. For example, In Chapter 1 the author shares with us that fathers need to help their kids beat the odds. It is in this chapter that he shares the grim statistics as to what happens to a majority of children who grow up in homes where there is not a solid, stable and present father in the home. The majority of the children grow up to become criminals seriously emotionally impaired. It is a grim picture to be sure. He then concludes the chapter as he does each one with what he calls a "Takeaway" which is a short plan of action with either a Scriptural passage or appropriate quote to drive the point of the chapter home so it will sink into our brains as dads and we get it and will just do it. The "Takeaway" he gives us as dads in Chapter 1 is "Just opening this book and reading it this far proves you want to be the kind of dad your kids need. You can do it, Dad." He then quotes Sigmund Freud, "I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father's protection." And in this evil day we are living in one thing our kids need from us as dads more than ever is our protection.

And then author Payleitner shares with us 51 other very different and practical things we need to do for our kids as a father. For example, Chapter 2 tells us that we need to "Stop and Catch the Fireflies," and then there is Chapter 6, "To Kneel or Stand by Their Bed As They Sleep, Watching, Praying, Appreciating the Gift of Our Children, and Thinking About the Meaning of Love." It is an emotionally touching chapter with a most important message for us as dads. In Chapter 10 the author informs us that our kids need us "To Spy On Them." He states in the first page of this chapter , "Don't let Your Kids Read This Chapter," and the reason being if you read it and do what the author suggests you will keep your kids safe in a very dangerous world. So, that chapter is for parents eyes only just in case you buy the book.

In Chapter 16 the author writes that kids need their dads to "Avoid the Clichés;" you know to avoid the statements like "Because I said so," or "Look at me when I'm talking to you," and some other popular phrases, (phrases that are popular with us but not so with our kids), that we like to use quite often on our kids as dads. Then there is Chapter 16, kids need us to "Rent a Dolphin for an Hour," using a personal example from his own family's life that will touch your heart. In Chapter 21 he writes kids need their dads to "Teach Them the Word Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis," which is about "feeding our children's natural curiosity." He reminds us of the importance of being our children's greatest cheerleader in chapter 26. That is so important. Our kids need our constant love and affirmation of their personhood...of their worth as individuals. Chapter 32 hit home with me and that is that our kids do not need us to "Yell about Spilled Milk." As a parent I really failed in this area with my youngest son - yelling at him for doing things normal kids do, and I yelled at him a lot - treating him like I expected him to act as an adult when he was only 9 years old. The consequences of my actions were devastating in his life as well as mine. So dads...lighten up and don't "Yell over Spilled Milk."

In Chapter's 38 and 39 author Payleitner has two different messages of advice: one for the fathers of daughters and that is that "Daughters Need Their Dad...To Willingly Do the Hokey-Pokey, the Macarena, and Even the Chicken Dance," and the other is for fathers of sons which is the message that our sons need us to be "Their Sparring Partner." Just make sure you wear the headgear dad when you do this with your sons.

There are 13 more chapters of the book where the author reminds us of 13 more important things that kids need from their dads. Chapters 47 and 48 are really important as they are about showing proper love and affection for our wives and their mom in front of the kids. They may groan, roll their eyes at us and say, "Oh dad or mom," but just know that deep down inside they are loving every minute of our doing it and loving us as well for doing it. Chapter 51 is a chapter that has a painful but yet ever so necessary message for us as dad's to embrace and live out and that is to teach our kids to one day be able to live without us. As author Payleitner writes, "That our ultimate goal is to make ourselves obsolete-to work our way out of a job." It's easy to read but harder do to because we love our kids so much we don't want to see them grow up and eventually move on their own lives to live. But it is a part of the circle of life that we just can not avoid. In the final chapter he reminds us "To Not Confuse Heritage with Legacy." He writes, "The past, present and future come together right here, right now. Don't miss the power of this turning point in time. Your heritage has been defined by others. It has limits and liabilities. But your legacy remains undefined. It has no limits. It only has potential." And I truly believe that! At the end of his book he provides us with some helpful blogs and websites to visit where we will find more invaluable insights and helpful tools to equip us to be the kind of dads our kids so desperately want and need us to be.

And here's to your being effective, successful and happy dads!

I have received a complementary copy of the book. 52 Things Kids Need From A Dad, from the publisher, Harvest House Publishers for reviewing it.
15 people found this helpful
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Not bad, but not what I was expecting

The description of this book states that it has Tough, Frank Advice....and insinuates that it is for men who "act like men." I have read the first few chapters (each of the 52 things are about 2-3 pages) and glanced through the rest including 4 pages of terrible knock-knock jokes that that are supposed to get across the idea that parents should laugh with their kids. All the advice given is good and may be helpful for most readers....I just wish that it was presented in a more direct and real way (like it is advertised). The book overall is pretty short and each chapter is so brief that the topics are only touched on superficially.
14 people found this helpful
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Super religious

This book is great. If...you are extremly religious and you are not a single parent and if you think that participation tropheys are unearned horrible things to have your child recieve. I got this book for my son, but after reading a few chapters I am sending it back. That is one thing that my adult child needs from me.
2 people found this helpful
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A must read for all dads!

This thoughtfully written book is an easy, fun read that is filled with practical simple ideas . . . ideas that inspire action!
Dads, don't pass on this book. It's a treasured resource that merits a place on your bedside table.
2 people found this helpful
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Light and easy reading that tells you what you already know

Most of the advice found in this book is obvious. Be there for your kids. Show them love, patience, and kindness. Be a good role model. Teach them how to behave and how to treat others. Teach them a love of learning. Teach them good morals and how to be respectable. These basic concepts of ideal fatherhood are highlighted in each of the 52 short, 2-3 page chapters. Maybe reading this will help some fathers start thinking about all the ways they can be there for their kids, and when the opportunity arises, they may be more likely to step up, but I feel like most dads that care enough to read this book are probably already on board with 95% of the “tips” found here.

The most memorable of the 52 chapters to me was “To catch them in a lie”. Payleitner’s idea is that you want to make that first instance of purposefully lying to a parent such a BIG DEAL that they may never do it again. Most parent’s inclination would be to ignore it (pretend it didn’t happen) or gently chastise a child with rational discourse on why lying is frowned upon. Payleitner thinks you should take the opportunity to put the fear of God (literally) into them and then go on and on about how serious lying is. This is an interesting approach, one that strikes me as a little extreme somehow, but if it works, maybe it is worth considering. My kids are not at that age yet, so I have a couple of years to consider it…

This book is light reading to say the least. There are cute stories, a few novel suggestions, and a lot of basic confidence boosters. Most readers will enjoy it (unless they are offended by Christianity) but I think you should look elsewhere if you’re looking for a book to really make you think. Funnily, the most profound statement in the book comes n the very last paragraph, where Payleitner states that “Your children are your most tangible connection to the future here on Earth. Your legacy remains undefined. It has no limits. It has only potential.” That is a nice thought and definitely worth thinking about.
1 people found this helpful
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Five Stars

Good information
1 people found this helpful
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Nice

Good read. If you're kids have a great dad, he will already know most of this!
1 people found this helpful
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Surprisingly my guy really appreciated receiving this....

We both have young children from our previous marriages and I wasn't sure how well he'd receive this gift and he enjoyed it a lot :-)
1 people found this helpful
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Excellent

Great read and instruction from this book! Purchase was to my house sooner than I thought and every parent should read this book, its priceless.
1 people found this helpful
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A Must Read For Fathers (And Mothers)

'52 Things Kids Need From a Dad' by Jay Payleitner is a terrific book that should be read by all fathers.

It contains fun activities such as catching fireflies, renting a dolphin for an hour, and buying them a unicycle. It also has great lessons such as answering their questions with a question, getting right with his dad, and to not yell about spilled milk. There are many more in those categories, as well as other areas.

It has lots of thought provoking and practical advice. Many things in this book are items that I wish I would have thought of when my kids were younger.

I highly recommend this book for any father. If you're a mother, buy it for your kids' father or read it yourself, particularly if you're a single mom. Many of the ideas in here will work just fine for moms as well.

Great book.

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